I have always been amazed by videos and stories about people cheating death but never did it cross my mind that I would ever feel such uncommon circumstance. No, this is not what you are thinking, I didn’t literally “cheat death” but gahddd did it feel that way.
What am I talking about, you ask? I needed a 0.3 to pass my IT class. A frickennn .3 is all that I needed to be saved. To be able to live again, well not literally but in this case passing this class would mean that I have a chance in fulfilling my wish to shift to the course I desire, which is almost the same as living again if you ask me. (My shifting story is for another time)
When I saw that my professor had posted our class standing my eyes immediately made its way to my grades, well maybe because mine was on top of the list, not because I got the highest grade (boyyy did I wish that that was the case) but unfortunately it was only because the arrangement was in alphabetical order. When I saw what my grades were my heart sank so low that it seemed like I was stepping on it. My stomach had that weird feeling, the feeling I felt the first time I rode “The Abyss” ride in Hong Kong Ocean Park – like I left my stomach in the air. If you haven’t had the feeling, believe me you wouldn’t want to.
My emotions were like made by a world-renowned bartender – it was a mix of a little of everything. The only difference is that it was a little of everything BAD. I felt sad for it seemed that I have failed. AGAIN. Regret took over me. I also felt really mad at myself for not giving my all, like “Girl get yourself together. You are better than that so act like it!” – that was what went on in my head.
What if I pushed a little more? Went to class a little more? Did a little more of what is required of me?Would I be writing this blog? HELL NO! I would be relaxing and enjoying my vacation but the shit person that I am didn’t do those “little mores” so this is the price I pay.
The sun had shine on me when my ever so gorgeous and quick-witted professor allowed me to redeem myself by making this blog. Heaven sent is what she is. It is with my whole heart that I thank her for this opportunity. I wouldn’t let this opportunity go to waste, rest assured I would give my best in everything I do from this point forward. This experience has taught me a lot and has been a turning point in my life.